This weekend was full. Full of bugs and in-between-ness.
I was surrounded and alone. Working and not. Real conversations and those in my head and vivid dreams that had me confused between the two.
I planted so many plants, got my hands ragged with dirt and soil and rocks. Sprayed to gagging with anti-bug spray and swathed in netting, wreathed in blackflies and mosquitoes like an insectoid nightmare. Burned by the sun and chemicals, but happy to be digging and growing.
Then I ventured out for five minutes and got bit under the eye, and said eye is still swollen. Like I'd been punched but more red than purple.
There were ins and outs and what-have-yous. Elderly dogs, a how-is-this-cat-still-alive cat, a not-quite "puppy."
A pseudo parade, with Girl Scouts riding a tank down the main street.
Not enough sleep and not enough talk, except inside my head. Disappointments and arguments I mostly imagined, but fear will come to be real.
I hope I'll sort it out tomorrow, but I'm not confident I will.
If you can't make sense of this, don't worry -- neither can I. Yet.
Posted by thevieve at May 26, 2008 9:49 PM